


High Voltage

by thecommunistotter



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: American!reader, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Mutual Pining, Older!Reader, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reader-Insert, Slightly Spicy, Teacher-Student Relationship, and so also for the end of s3, but only after graduation, shorter!reader, so much pining, spoilers for karasuno vs shiratorizawa match, this will probably get kind of OOC so i'm sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-21
Updated: 2016-11-26
Packaged: 2018-08-23 18:13:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8337715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecommunistotter/pseuds/thecommunistotter
Summary: The sound of your laughter was so perfect to him that it felt like he could listen to it forever. He immediately wanted to tell you more jokes, but you apologized amid some residual chuckles and said you had to leave, but that you’d see him around. When he thought about how great that sounded, he realized he was truly, well and completely screwed.And when he saw you later getting in a car with a group of people he recognized to be teachers at his school, and that you were talking to them as peers, he realized that he might as well just be absolutely fucked.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> *sweats* ok this is like.... the first fanfic i've actually posted for public consumption in like, over 10 years so i'm nervous. I was really concerned about the topic & nature of this fic w/ the current fandom climate but decided to go for it b/c the tendou/reader tag is so empty and i love him. for any concerned parties, tendou is 18 in canon (his birthday is May 20th so he's actually closer to being 19 during this fic, not like, barely 18 or anything), and nothing actually happens until after graduation, so i didn't tag for underage. I usually don't write chaptered fic but i thought if i did it this way, i might be motivated to actually finish it. also, this fic is unbeta'd, and while i think i did a pretty good job, please point out any typos and concrit is welcome in the comments. I can't promise i will change much but i will take it into consideration for the future. chapters will probably be short. i hope you enjoy.

The sting of defeat is about as fresh as it gets when he first spots you. You’re in the crowd, waiting after the end of the game. You stand out. He’s never seen you before and you really don’t look like you’re from around here, yet you’re standing in the Shiratorizawa stands waiting with the rest of the fans to give them what amounts to consolation applause. Tendou prides himself in being observant but he’s never seen you before, and you’re wearing the school colors like you’d been there for years. He watches you from the corner of his eye while they line up to bow. It’s possible you might even be crying a little.

Later, after everyone is cleaned up and it’s time to head out, he spots you milling about with the rest of the crowd and tells his team he’ll be right back. So as he approaches you, standing there looking at your phone, he notices two things: one, you’re much shorter than him, and two, you’re muttering to yourself in English. He scrambles with his English knowledge, trying to find something to say, and finally comes up with

“Are you…,” he wrangles the right word to his mouth, a surprising amount of nerves hindering his recall, “…lost?”

You turn around in surprise and look up into his face. You smile, and to his relief, reply in Japanese, “No, I’m just waiting for someone.” And so Tendou strikes up a conversation with you, idle chatter, with both of you trying to avoid poking the tender wound that is this last game, when it happens. Now, if he tried to recall what exactly it was he said, he couldn’t, because whatever it was, while certainly devastatingly hilarious, was eclipsed by your response. You laughed, loudly, perfectly, and wholly. No reservations, just you embracing the joke and not wanting to let it go. Your smile is so wide, your eyes crinkling and he thinks he could look at you like this every minute for the rest of his life. The sound of your laughter was so perfect to him that it felt like he could listen to it forever. He immediately wanted to tell you more jokes, but you apologized amid some residual chuckles and said you had to leave, but that you’d see him around. When he thought about how great that sounded, he realized he was truly, well and completely screwed.

And when he saw you later getting in a car with a group of people he recognized to be teachers at his school, and that you were talking to them as peers, he realized that he might as well just be absolutely fucked.

His return to school is accompanied by rumors about the new American English teacher and he wondered if it was you. His suspicions were confirmed a week later when he finally saw you walking out of the teacher’s lounge. You were smiling when you exited but Tendou thinks he saw it falter a bit when you saw him, and his heart twists, but soon your smile widens and you animatedly begin to engage in a conversation with him. He thinks about how you meet his eyes with no hesitation and how sometimes even tough guys on the street get freaked out when they make accidental eye contact, and so he follows your gaze as it drifts down towards his bag and his assortment of keychains and charms.

“Oh. My. God,” you say in English and he briefly braces for a lecture on maturity and how Jump is for kids and- “Is that an All Might keychain??” You switch back to Japanese and continue, “I’ve been wanting to look for one since I got here but I haven’t had time!”

Tendou makes an instant decision. He reaches down, unhooks the keychain, takes your hand and places the sudden gift directly in your palm. 

“Here,” he says “you can have this one.” And when you protest, he tells you that it’s fine, he has plenty and you can absolutely have it. That’s a lie of course, it was limited edition and he had to go to a special café to get it, but he thinks that having to buy another one online is absolutely a worthwhile price to pay for the chance to hear someone at his school talk about his interest without a hint of derision in their voice. His alarm chimes and he has to leave, but as he leaves, he hasn’t realized he’s missed something.

For all his focus on the conversation and the charm, he misses the soft intake of breath you make when you see him outside the faculty room, and he misses the blush that begins to creep up your neck and ears as his large hands close over yours to give you the keychain.

And so as you both walk away, Tendou pictures the exact hole he’s digging himself into, and unbeknownst to him, you’re doing the very same thing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i did it! i wrote another chapter! this one is longer too! *throws confetti* I also like to think i got tendou a little bit more in character this time. As a note, i decided to use Leon instead of Reon when he appears in this chapter since they use it in the more official anime subs.

“I want to visit America one day.”

Your heart leapt into your throat, both at the sudden intrusion of the voice, and at realizing who it belonged to. You were quietly studying some of the plants in the flowerbeds after school one day, crouching down to view them in more detail and enjoying the relative silence, when Tendou’s voice interrupted your solitude. It wasn’t unwelcome, but you turned towards him with a start in your surprise and lost your balance, falling awkwardly onto the pavement. He’s by your side in a flash, grip firm yet gentle on your arm as he helps you stand up. When he releases you, your arm still burns hot where his hands been moments before. You think that perhaps you should only wear long sleeves from now on, if this feeling is what short sleeves get you. When you look up at his face, he’s got one of his strange smiles on and his eyes glimmer with mirth.

“You’re not my English teacher, but you’re the only American working at our school. I’m good enough but I’d like to get better. We could meet during lunch every so often. Would you mind giving me some… extracurricular attention?”

It’s like his voice is winking at you. You desperately wished he wouldn’t say it like that. Taking a second to think about it, you don’t remember anyone telling you that you couldn’t help students who weren’t in your class, or anything about tutoring students during school hours. Extra effort like this would certainly improve his scores, and it’s a good skill to be proficient in, so there are a lot of pros to this situation. Hell, you might even get commended for investing your free time into teaching when you don’t have to. But on the other hand… there are so many ways in which this is a bad idea. First among them is the fact that you think you might be beginning to harbor inappropriate feelings for this guy. Surely he deserves a better tutor than someone whose first reaction to his innocent jokes is illicit thoughts. However, you decide to throw caution to the wind.

“Sure! That sounds like a plan. Is once every other week ok? I would offer a more frequent meeting but I don’t want to get backed up with work,” you replied. That wasn’t the truth, you just didn’t think that more frequent meetings would be good for your heart and possibly for your reputation as well. With that, he waves good bye, promising to meet you at the beginning of next week, in the classroom you teach in. You thought about his hands on your arm again but quickly shook it from your mind. You couldn’t let these thoughts get the better of you.

***

A few drops of sweat rolled down Tendou’s back as he walked away. God, that had been a clusterfuck of awkwardness hadn’t it?? Why would he say something like that to a teacher, like in actual real life? It was funny in his head but he was lucky you hadn’t admonished him. He hoped you wouldn’t tell his homeroom teacher. He had to talk to someone about this, because these emotions were just getting worse and worse and if he didn’t have a way to vent this steam he’d probably explode.

He thought about who he could ask on the way back to his dorm. Eita? Nah, they were friends but he isn’t sure Eita would do much more than tease him about it relentlessly. Wakatoshi was out of the question. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust his roommate and close friend or that he wouldn’t tell him eventually, but Wakatoshi’s stoicism and literalism didn’t translate into good advice for anyone but himself, especially in something like this. He’d probably just say he should get over it or something equally obvious but impossible. So he figured he should just go see Leon first. Leon was one of those people who had a knack for saying the right thing at the right time, and Tendou didn’t think he’d shame him for his awkward crush either. Probably.

“Hmmm… I’m not really sure that I can give you advice per say, but you can talk to me about it whenever you want,” his comrade told him over dinner that evening. “It’s definitely a touchy subject but I don’t think what you’re feeling is wrong, just probably… uncomfortable? Do you think she knows? And wait, how old is she again??”

“I don’t think she knows, thank god. Though if I get in trouble tomorrow I guess that’ll be my answer. And I haven’t actually asked her. Isn’t it rude to ask a woman her age?? For shame, Leon~! And does it really matter?” Tendou replied, somewhat flippantly.

“Clearly, it does matter. You haven’t heard anything?”

“Well I think I did hear someone say this was her first job out of college. And I thought she was our age when I first saw her too, so she can’t be THAT old. So it’s not weird on that level, technically, PROBABLY…”

The conversation didn’t really reach any new revelatory heights from there, so Tendou returned to his dorm, with his steps at least lightened of the load of secrecy. He smacked Wakatoshi’s broad back in greeting as his roommate had his headphones in while he did homework. The big guy didn’t even startle. It was admirable, but Tendou had to wonder if he would ever react strongly to anything, even if he were in real danger. But he’d probably just stare whatever it was down and save everyone from danger without even lifting a finger. Tendou briefly pondered the concept: Wakatoshi, a super hero who intimidated villains into surrender. Even natural disasters retreat in his gaze! Nah, it wouldn’t work. Maybe as a one shot, but not a series. It wouldn’t go in his ideas book. There was no school tomorrow, so he flopped down on his bed and pulled his laptop out from off the bedside table where it was charging, intending to catch up on his shows, but he finds himself distracted and unable to pay attention. So instead he goes to sleep earlier than usual.

And he dreams of you, of holding your hand, of touching your soft arm again. Dream him leans in, tightens his grip slightly, gazes into your bright eyes, which are slowly closing and covers the distance between his face and yours and– 

He awakes with a start, eyes wide and heart pounding. _Shit_. He knew a restless night was ahead of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i haven't started on the next chapter yet so it might take a little bit before that shows up. but i have a general outline of what happens written so i think i can complete this eventually. thanks to everyone who bookmarked/subscribed/kudos'd!  
> edit: i just want to say that conversation is really hard for me to write and i usually try to avoid it in my unpublished fics but i'm trying here so! let me know if things seem really unnatural.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone sorry for the delay, i had midsemester assessments and assignments, and then got behind in work, and then had a medical situation that made it hard to focus, and then it was also Halloweekend. I wanted this chapter to be a little longer, as my goal was 1k a chapter but it's close enough and has a natural endpoint so i figured i should just post this. Enjoy!

Time was passing quickly, and things soon fell into a comfortable routine. You were mostly able to keep things on an even keel when meeting Tendou for his tutoring. Since it was informal, you figured the best thing to do for him would be to have conversations in English, to help him understand how native speakers spoke better, and for him to practice speaking it in a natural way that they don’t necessarily teach in class. You were kind of worried that you’d get a million other requests for tutoring, since in the interest of fairness and equal treatment, you’d have to accept as many as your free time allowed, and you wouldn’t ever get to relax, but it never got worse than a few of his volleyball teammates tagging along. You’d make sure to bring up a variety of topics in conversation, but still, you both spent a lot of time discussing mutual interests, like volleyball and manga, amongst other things. So, things were professional. Great!

Except, of course, for a few times it wasn’t.

It started when he requested that you meet every week instead of every other.

“But, Tendou-san, you’re doing so well with our current schedule, why do you feel the need to meet more often?” you ask

“Exactly, Sensei! If I’m doing this well with meetings as infrequent as this, imagine how much I’d improve if we met more often!” He was almost impressed with his own slyness. The truth was just that he enjoyed talking to you so much and wanted to see you more often. “If we meet every week, we won’t have so much Jump stuff to talk about, and you can tell me about all the other things you always want to bring up!”

Your eyes lit up. He got you. 

“Of course! How could I not have thought about that!” Your fist hit your other palm with a square smack, as if you’d just had the most brilliant thought to ever grace humankind, and you continued, “I can’t wait to go more in depth with you on American politics and culture! Oh, there’s going to be so much to talk about! We’ll start with regional differences and….”

Tendou smiled as you trailed off into thought. He looked like the proverbial cat with the canary. He’d thought you’d protest a little, saying something about your busy schedule, but you’d acquiesced easily. The thought occurred to him that maybe you enjoyed and anticipated the meetings as much as he did. His heart jumped a little at the idea. He thought about the way your face looked when you got particularly into the political topic at hand, how it’d get kind of scrunched up in passion, and even slightly red when you got to something that really got you mad. Maybe he was looking forward to the politics stuff more than he thought.

You stood up though, making to leave, as your allotted spare time was over. As you passed through the doorway, however, you turned around, and gave him a slight wave.

“Goodbye, Tendou-san! See you next week,” you said with a small (but to him, brilliant) smile. 

“Yeah. Bye!” he replied quickly. He felt like his heart had climbed into his throat.

***

“Wow! Sounds like Satori-kun’s in love,” Leon said teasingly. He tried to ruffle Tendou’s hair but his only option was some sort of bastardized attempt at one. Hair gel was not conducive to friendly team bonding activities. Well, _most_ of the time…

“Wait, Satori-kun??? In LOVE??” That was Eita. Shit, he’d never let him live this one down. 

Tendou scrambled to his feet, and puffed his chest out, declaring “I’m not in love, I’m not capable of mushy shit like that,” doing his best to exude bravado and willing them to drop it and let him go

“So who is it?!” Eita again. He was so nosy when he thought there was something he could rib Tendou about.

“It’s nobody! Can we please just go back to practicing now?” He was no longer beholden to attend practice, but since so many of his friends were continuing to play volleyball in college, he figured it couldn’t hurt him to help out his teammates sometimes. Besides, he still enjoyed playing, so why not.

“Wow, it must be serious if he actually wants to practice that badly for once. Let’s go then,” Leon said with an easy laugh. Tendou slumped onto the bench a little as they left. He made eye contact with Wakatoshi across the court. He gave his roommate a weak grin. Wakatoshi only looked concerned. Crap, he must really be obvious if he’s getting this kind of look from him. The ace might be reserved and focused, but he wasn’t stupid and he’d probably noticed the way Tendou’s been acting lately. He wondered if he’d bring anything up tonight. Probably not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for being patient!  
> edit: hey life has just, wow, kicked my ass lately and so i haven't gotten anything done but i dropped my worst class so maybe i'll have some time for this soon! i literally broke out in hives from stress so i hope you all forgive me for the lateness. also in about a month i'll be done with this semester so if i don't update before then (hopefully i will), you can expect some more soon after that. like an early christmas present.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> holy shit hi everyone!!! I'm back for now! I come bearing a 3k chapter at least!! are you ready for ANGST??? sorry if you aren't. It actually made me kind of upset writing some of this lol! If that's the kind of thing you're really in to, i hope i delivered. If not, well take heart in that this isn't actually an angst fic and it will get better, i promise. also, I tried to avoid doing Ari Craft cause it's not my favorite thing but i couldn't avoid it in this chapter. I recommend you use the InteractiveFics extension on Chrome, as it lets you automatically replace stuff like that with your name, making it more immersive. Idk if there's something similar on other browsers but I hope there is! It works so well i accidentally nearly published this with my own last name in it LOL  
> some content warnings: It gets a little spicy in this chapter, not in any way that violates the T rating but i wanted to let y'all know. Also there's a portion where Tendou ignores personal space rules and could come off as like, overbearing or disrespectful? If that's something that upsets you, stop reading when it starts talking about presents and I'll make sure to sort of summarize the essentials of that scene in the next chapter.  
> anyways it's almost 2AM and i have to be up at 7AM but i did this to myself....

The weeks flew by and soon it was near the end of the second term. Your weekly meetings with Tendou were going well. His English was definitely improving and you were learning some of the finer points of Japanese culture as well. You also knew just about everything about the current Jump lineup. Of course, that wasn’t the only thing you talked about. Conversation had turned to each other’s family and friends, and both the past and plans for the future. When you’d told him your ultimate goal in life, he’d told you it was a great idea and that you’d be amazing at it. You were supportive when he told you he wasn’t so sure what he wanted to do yet and encouraged him to take a wide variety of classes in college before deciding on a major. There had even been a few times where the topic had turned to less than pleasant things that had happened to both of you in the past. It was heartening to think that despite his previous hardships, Tendou had finally found a place where he belonged and had real friends. At this point, you two got along so famously that you were at the point where if he wasn’t your student you’d call him your close friend. But he was your student, so you had no idea how to describe your relationship. 

You had gotten permission to put up Christmas decorations once the last few weeks of December rolled around, and you recruited Tendou to help you put them up.

“You know, if you’d just let me put up the decorations, it’d be much easier. I’d hardly have to use a ladder, unlike a certain short person I know,” he teased. 

“You wouldn’t get it right,” you replied matter-of-factly as you positioned the ladder against the wall where you wanted to hang a garland. He dug around in your pile of approved decorations.

“What, no mistletoe? What’s a proper American Christmas without that?!” he said as his search turned up empty.

You turned to look at him as you finished setting up the ladder. You fixed him with the most stern, teacherly look you could muster in the moment. “Now, Tendou-kun, that would hardly be appropriate, would it?” you admonished. Then you laughed as he held his hands up in surrender. His gaze softened. “Tendou-kun, could you be so kind as to spot me while I’m up this ladder?” you requested. He moved in behind you as you started to climb, keeping a safe distance and keeping his eyes in a safe place too. You were wearing a knee-length pencil skirt, so he wouldn’t be able to see anything he shouldn’t, but he still felt awkward about it. So he watched your hands as you hung the garland, and looked on as the strand of hair you kept tucking behind your ear came lose repeatedly.

Eventually you were done with your task. Instinctively, you stepped back to survey your work.

Oh. You were on a ladder. Your foot found no purchase and you began to fall, and you wonder how you could have been so stupid when suddenly a pair of strong hands grab your waist and your descent is halted. Tendou caught you, his quick reflexes kicking in just in time. His grip is tight around your waist as he helps you regain your footing and get off the ladder. When your feet are safely on solid ground, you realize his hands are still around your waist.

He’s close enough to you that he can smell your shampoo. He can feel the heat of your skin through your thin dress shirt. He shifts his hands a little, unconsciously, tightening his grip, and feels his fingers press into your yielding flesh. He thinks he might lose himself in this feeling when he feels you squirm a little in his grasp.

“Tendou-kun…,” you hear his breath hitch a little when you say his name. Your face is red and hot and your heart is pounding. Your waist is ticklish, and his grip is making your mind think of things it shouldn’t. You do your best to dismiss these thoughts, and you managed to say, “Please let go of me, that’s… a sensitive spot….”

He removes his hands immediately. He shouts a quick apology and in a flash he’s out the door, leaving you alone with your heart palpitations. You have to sit down for a while to regain a sense of normalcy. You get the feeling you should have asked one of your regular students to help instead.

Tendou races across campus to his dorm room, ignoring Wakatoshi in his usual desk spot in favor of flopping onto his bed dramatically. He screams, frustrated, into his pillow. Wakatoshi looks up, startled, and wonders what has gotten into his friend lately. He’s never seen Tendou like this before, and the red-head barely says anything to him as they work on homework and he’s uncharacteristically quiet and pensive at dinner. Eita and Leon exchange looks with him, clearly concerned. Leon has an inkling of what’s gotten into him, but he doesn’t say anything and resolves to ask about it later when he can get Tendou alone. 

The opportunity comes fairly soon after dinner when Wakatoshi and Eita leave to make a run to the convenience store before curfew is enforced. With both of their roommates gone, he was sure they wouldn’t be interrupted and that Tendou would probably be more comfortable. The door is open when he gets to Tendou’s room. Tendou himself is sitting crosslegged on his bed reading something. He looks up as Leon knocks on the door frame.

“Can I come in?” Leon asks. Tendou things for a second, and then begrudgingly agrees. Leon closes the door behind him and sits at Tendou’s desk. 

“I don’t think I actually want to talk about it,” Tendou says eventually. He’s visibly grumpy.

Leon tilts his head. “Is this about (l/n)-sensei? I noticed you haven’t brought her up in a while but you still go to tutoring sessions with her. Did something happen?” He notices a blush form on Tendou’s face, which is curious. He files it away for another time.

“Yes,” Tendou says, “but I really don’t feel like telling you.” He’s cross again, and knows he’s being irrational but everything is still so fresh on his mind that he can’t bring himself to talk about it.

Leon is quiet for a few minutes, before he gets up. “Ok,” he says, smiling, “just know that I’m always around to chat.” With that, he leaves the room.

Tendou sighs. He can’t focus and he’s not going to finish this chapter tonight. He’ll read the rest at breakfast tomorrow. He gets ready for bed and climbs under the sheets just as Wakatoshi enters the room. His roommate wishes him good night, and then after a beat, “Feel better.” Tendou burrows under his sheets and eventually drifts into sleep.

He knows he tosses and turns all night and has a million dreams but when he awakes he can only remember one. It was a recreation of the incident from earlier, except some things were definitely different. For one, he was a lot closer to you. Close enough that his chest was pressed against your back. His hands were still on your waist, but in the dream your shirt was untucked and his fingers were directly on your skin, up under the edge of the garment. He slid the fingers of one hand under the waistband of your skirt, just a little. Even though it was a dream he could feel his heart beating in his throat. You tilt your head to the side. He watches your hair slide over your shoulder, and your neck is exposed to him. “Satori…” you sigh. He tightens his grip, and you squirm like you did in the classroom. His other hand creeps up and he feels your ribs under his fingers. He presses down in the concave space between two of the bones and you giggle, clearly ticklish. His fingertip grazes the underwire of your bra. You turn your head to meet his eye and smile in a way he’s never actually seen on your face. He feels feral, like he’s obeying some command of nature, like maybe he’s the monster everyone’s called him all these years. He turns his attention to your exposed neck. Your shirt has been pulled away from your neck, leaving a broad expanse of skin in front of him, so enticing and so exquisite. He brings his head down and presses a chaste kiss to the place where you shoulder and neck meet, and stays like that for a second, taking in the imagined heady scent of your skin, and then, opens his mouth and bites down.

That’s when he woke up. Recalling it made him flustered again, so he lay in his bed, pressing the heels of his palms to his eyes and grinding his teeth, willing the imagery to go away. This won’t be the last dream he has of you before the term ends.

***

The third term of the year has started. The cold air of January seeps through the classroom windows. The fact that the volleyball team should be heading to nationals about now weighs heavily on everyone’s minds, but it’s affecting the third years the most. It’s visible in their faces and in how they seem to be slightly more irritable than usual. The only one who seems unaffected is Ushijima, but everyone knows he must be thinking about it too. And then there’s the fact that they’ll be graduating soon. The impending threat of true adulthood and future plans looms over all of them. 

Tendou would tell anyone who asked that he was fine and that there was nothing to worry about. After all, he got into the school he wanted to, he was going to the same school as Wakatoshi and they planned to room together too, so how much would really change except the setting? But the reality was that it was getting to him. He even caught himself biting his nails a few times over break, a habit he thought he’d gotten rid of. So, whenever he’d start to get overwhelmed, he tried to turn his minds to other things, like manga and comparing chocolate ice creams, but the only thing that ever really helped was thinking about you.

He knew it wasn’t a good idea, that it really wasn’t a healthy way to cope with the stress but dammit if it wasn’t effective. Whenever his thoughts turned mushy, he could feel his stress melting away. He thought about what it might be like to hold your hand, small and soft in his, to press his lips to your palm and smell the flowery hand lotion he’d seen you use. He thought about your beautiful eyes, your long eyelashes and how they brushed against your cheek when you closed them, the way the corners of your eyes crinkled when you smiled, and how it deepened when you laughed that amazing laugh of yours, the one that had caught him so off guard the day he met you. Once again he thinks he could listen to it forever, and that he’d give just about anything to be able to do so. 

He also thinks about the curve of your waist and how his hands had fit perfectly there that day he’d stopped you from falling in the classroom, how soft you’d felt underneath his fingers and how you had shivered a little when he’d accidentally gripped you too hard. He’d actually be incredibly embarrassed if anyone found out exactly how _much_ he thought about that last one in particular, as well as how much he thought about kissing you. He imagined it’d feel fantastic. He’d kissed people before, and while it had been nice enough most of the time, it was never with anyone he’d felt a connection with, and definitely not with anyone who made him feel the way you did. He pictured his ideal first kiss with you. He’d lean down to level with you and you’d close your eyes and smile sweetly as he closed the distance between you. When your lips would finally meet, he figured you’d taste like the mint gum he always saw you chewing when you weren’t teaching. Your hands would rest behind his neck, your fingers brushing his skin lightly. He’d run his fingers through your hair. It’d probably be soft. He’d always loved to touch soft things, ever since he was little. Of course, you weren’t a thing, but he imagined that just about everything about you was soft and pleasant, but he wanted to find out so badly.

His brain churned with these feelings, but he managed to get his work done and when he came back to school, he thought that maybe now that he had less free time, he might be able to drop these almost obsessive thoughts of you. After all, while fun, they were surely inappropriate and he figured you’d probably never talk to him again if you knew.

***

You had spent most of your break on a whirlwind sightseeing tour, accompanied by a colleague you had quickly grown close to, so you were constantly busy. As a result, you didn’t have much time to think about much other than your itinerary for the next day, and any free time from touring you might have had was filled with your friend taking you to restaurants and enjoying the nightlife with you. It was so much fun but it was very exhausting. Still, your thoughts had still turned to Tendou from time to time. You’d wonder if he’d been to this site, or you’d see a piece of merch or a souvenir that would make you think of him. In the end, you’d actually bought him something. You had been at a market looking at all the wares when you had arrived at a table selling secondhand goods. It was there your eyes alighted upon the perfect gift. Tendou had mentioned that there had been a set of limited edition _Shokugeki no Soma_ themed rice bowls released a while back, but he hadn’t been able to get a hold of them, and they were very expensive online. So when you saw them on the table at a very cheap price point, you knew you had to buy them for him. You knew he would be so happy to get them. When you’d gotten back to the hotel, you must have been making a weird face while you wrapped the gift in the nice wrapping paper you had also bought, because your friend began to tease you about it. When she asked if it was for your boyfriend, however, your smile dropped and your face heated up. She noticed the change in your demeanor and dropped the subject, but you couldn’t stop worrying. Was this weird? Was it strange to buy Tendou a gift? Surely it couldn’t be wrong to buy something as a reward for a student as dedicated as he was. And he always made sure to help you with anything you needed, and he’d kept you from breaking your neck that one time, so he definitely deserved something in return. What harm could giving him a gift do?

And so you sat in the classroom, waiting for him to arrive for the first tutoring meeting of the term. You placed the present on the teacher’s desk for later and sat down in one of the nearby student’s desks and waited. You had been tied up during lunch today, and so had rescheduled the meeting to after school. The building was nearly empty and you can’t help but shake the feeling that maybe this wasn’t your best idea and that maybe you should have just canceled for the week. You shook the nerves off though and soon Tendou appeared in the door way, greeting you in a way that was ostensibly cheerful, but you could tell immediately:

Something was off.

He pulled up a desk across from you and for a while the meeting went as usual, as you caught up with small talk about your respective breaks, but his gaze was different. Sometimes it felt like his eyes were burning through you and your eyes would hone in on his tongue whenever he’d lick his lips, which was bizarrely frequent. And then, absentmindedly, you laid your hand on his arm (it was bare, he had rolled up his jacket sleeves earlier) while talking and left it there as you talked, not even seeing what you were doing. And when your hand slid down his forearm and you brushed his wrist with your thumb, you felt his pulse and you suddenly realized what you were doing. You looked at him, eyes wide with alarm, to find him fixed on your hand on his wrist. You snatch it back, holding it to your chest. You felt a bit of panic flutter in your chest. You shouldn’t have touched him like that. Slowly, his eyes moved to look at your face. It was like a switch had been flipped, and you jumped out of your chair and faced away from him, afraid of what might happen if you made eye contact. The chair scraped the floor as he got out of his seat and you felt his presence close behind you. 

Gathering your courage you whipped around and… you could feel his breath, hot on your face, he was so close. Your eyes met his and you felt like maybe you were under a spell. The tension was thick on the air. Something in his eyes changed and he bent over more and leaned in and–

“Don’t!!” you exclaimed as you shoved him away. You took a few steps back, putting space between the two of you. Tendou’s face faltered. He looked vulnerable, far from the usual confident aura he exuded. He approached you again, grabbing your hand this time. His hand, large and calloused, is hot and slightly sweaty. He’s nervous and it shows in his face. You’ve never seen him like this before. He calls you by your given name, in an unsure voice.

You whip your hand out of his, as if you’ve been burned. He’s hurt again.

“Stop! I can’t do this! _We_ can’t do this! Do you know how much trouble we could get in? It’s not right and it’s not professional. Both of our reputations would be ruined. I’d lose my job, where would I go? Back to America? Is that what you want?” you say, voice shaking. You can’t meet his eyes.

“I don’t care about that! I like you! Actually, I might be in _love_ with you! I think you’re amazing and that I’ll never meet anyone as perfect as you again! Who cares about reputation?!” he snaps. You look up at him. He’s advancing on you. You back away from him until you bump into the teacher’s desk. He’s on top of you in a second, and you can tell that he’s mad now. The look on his face is scarily passionate. He pins you against the desk, and presses his body up against yours. You can feel your skin start to heat up. He reaches up and puts his hands on the sides of your face, threading his long fingers through your hair. You’ve never seen this expression before either and you struggle to pin down what it means. He looks mad, upset and desperate all at the same time, with something else in there too. His thumb brushes your cheek. You feel a tear roll down your face.

And all of the sudden his expression changes. Heartbreak this time, you think briefly. He lets you go and is halfway across the room in what seems like a second. He doesn’t look at you as you hurry from the room, hot, silent tears streaming down your cheeks.

He moves to leave when he notices the box in bright wrapping paper on the teachers' desk right behind where you had been just moments before. He examines it and his heart tightens painfully when he sees “Tendou-kun” written in messy Japanese on the attached tag. He takes it and goes to his dorm.

He doesn’t show up for your next scheduled meeting, but then again neither do you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sort of started writing the next chapter already and have a general idea planned out. There will probably only be a few more chapters in this story, but there will probably be at least one sequel of sorts so! Hopefully I won't take forever for the next chapter and I can try to finish this before the end of the year! I hope you enjoyed and thanks again for being patient!


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